One of my fellow Noodlers, Janet Mullany, has a new book out this month, and it's getting quite a bit of buzz on the Net (and elsewhere), so, naturally, I had to snag her by the throat and drag her over here to meet you all.

Janet is witty and British and oh-so-proper (about as proper as Mae West), and she wrote one hell of a book called The Rules of Gentility.

Rules is like a Bridget Jones's Diary set in the time of Jane Austen, and it's written in the alternating first person points of view of Miss Philomena Wellesley-Clegg and Mr. Inigo Linsley…both of whom are well-drawn, witty, articulate and naughty characters. I loved them both!

And when I asked Janet to stop in while I'm vacationing in Northern Michigan, she agreed to not only provide the very first Gardella Chronicles fanfiction (!!), but also to give away a copy of the book! Can you say W00T?

All together now: W00T!

So, without further ado, please meet the talented and witty Janet Mullany…(stay tuned below for how to win).

Colleen said I could blog about anything I wanted to, so I turned the job over to Miss Philomena Wellesley-Clegg, Regency fashionista and heroine of my August release The Rules of Gentility (available now. Buy, buy!! Or do what Colleen says to win a copy below). What I hadn’t realized about Philomena was that she actually met Victoria Gardella at a London ball… and had a very narrow escape indeed.

~~~ 

I cannot see Mr. Inigo Linsley anywhere–not of course that I wish to do so after his dreadful effrontery in calling me a ninny and–I blush to relate it–I fear he tried to bite my neck! Is this normal among amorous gentlemen? It was less of a bite than a nibble as though I were a particularly succulent slice of ham, but there were teeth involved.

Thinking I shall have to consult my sister in the matter (and although she is supposed to be my chaperone at this ball she is nowhere in sight), I strike up a conversation with a most elegant young woman, who, like me, seems to be alone.  After we exchange compliments on our gowns and head dresses, I ask her, “Miss Gardella–” a most romantic and foreign name indeed–“I feel I may confide in you. Tell me, do you ever have any trouble with gentlemen biting you?”

Her reaction is sudden and shocking. She grasps my arm and pulls me into a corridor outside the ballroom. Her eyes blaze with determination. “My dear Miss Wellesley-Clegg, you must tell me all. Who has tried to bite you? Is he here? Yes, he is. I know it…”

Before I can speak, there is a sudden clatter and I look down to see a wooden stake on the floor.

“D–n these garters,” she says.

As she bends to retrieve it I see a gentleman, tall and handsome, approach us. Although we have not been introduced, there is something about him that makes me feel warm all over; it as as though the silken cord I purchased this morning (1s . 3d a yard) binds us and draws me toward him. I fear I am about to swoon with the promise of pleasure to come. His eyes glow with passion as he reaches for me…

“Good riddance,” says my new friend Miss Gardella. She is slightly flushed, and she blows a little ash from her wooden accessory before lifting her skirt to tuck the item back into her garter. There is no sign of the gentleman, who, I now realize, is not nearly as handsome as Mr. Linsley. “I am quite parched. Shall we seek some lemonade?”

~~~

Fabulous, wasn't it? The whole book is just as wonderful, trust me!

Victoria never told me about that particular incident with Miss Wellesley-Clegg, but I'm sure there are lots of things she hasn't yet seen fit to divulge.

(If only she'd be more forthcoming, I might have more of the fourth book done by now!)

Anyway, in order to be entered in a chance to win Ms. Mullany's very fun, literate, witty novel, please make a relevant comment in the spotlight below, and I'll draw a name sometime after Tuesday, midnight EST (depending upon Internet connectivity and such).

Ms. Mullany (and Miss Wellesley-Clegg will be around to answer questions on Monday and Tuesday, so feel free to direct your queries as appropriate.)

Have fun!

We haven't done this in awhile, so it's time to come clean again. 'Fess up! Have you ever….

…lied to a cop who pulled you over for a ticket? 

In other words, made up a good story for why you were speeding/driving recklessly/etc.?

And did it work? Did you get off? 

Oh yeah. Bourne is the ult.

He frigging blows that other B-guy–who drinks martinis–out of the water. There is just no contest.

High-tech gimmickery v. hand to hand combat? Uh, I'll take the stark grunts and slaps and kicks and shattering glass to the fancy fandangled gadgets and lethal contraptions any day.

Weird-ass villains raking moons or with golden fingers or licenses to kill…v. The Good Ole Boys Network. Gimme some good ole boys–we gals have been fighting them for centuries anyway.

Constant on-the-prowl seduction in the most unlikely situations v. calm, unflappable expertise. The efficiency and spareness is so much hotter than a guy who's constantly trying to get down some bimbo's dress.

Jason Bourne. My new action thriller hero. Makes my heart go pitter-patter.

Go. See. The Bourne Ultimatum.

And then tell me what you think was going on with him and Nicky when he didn't remember.

Welcome to a (late) edition of Readers Ask, now moved to Wednesdays!

As always, send me your burning questions to questions at colleengleason dot com for a chance to win an advance copy of The Bleeding Dusk.

My email buddy David Jebb, an American currently living in Spain, has been carefully rereading Rises the Night, which has caused him to pepper me with the following questions about…Venatrixes (his word, not mine….but I kinda like it).

He asks: I have a question about the Venator system.  Zavier tells Victoria that only women directly related to the first Gardella can assume the legacy, whereas a male Venator can be a direct descendent, an off-shot or be completely unrelated and go through a series of trials, like Max.  Is this just because of the social conventions of the time?  If, say, there were a 21st century female Venator, could she be a non-Gardella because women have more choice today?

Great questions! Okay, first…the Gardellas are a very fruitful family and they've spread their roots throughout the world. So Gardellas–or at least, members of the family tree–can pop up everywhere, including The New World. And the Venator "sense" or "calling" can be found in both men and women.

However, only very few women throughout the ages have had the Call (and have answered it–remember, Lady Melly was called, but she didn't accept the Call) to be a Venator, and it seems–by virtue of genetics or design, I'm not sure–that only those women who are directly descended from the Gardella lineage have received the Call. 

At least, so far as Zavier knows.:-) (No, that's not a hint.)

…ever tried to put two contact lenses in the same eye, then wondered why the hell you couldn't see right?

Yeah. That was my morning. 

Between that, the rain pouring down, and Colette Gale nagging me, I think it's a great day to play hookey from Gardella Four–which I started yesterday!–and go see The Bourne Ultimatum.

I need me some Matt Damon.

You with me?