November 19, 2007
We're going to my mom's for Thanksgiving on Thursday–this will be the first time I (and the MM and kids) haven't hosted Turkey Day in about four years.
I called my mom, who is going back to work today after a short retirement of seven months because she got a 12-18 month consulting gig that she couldn't refuse, to find out what I could bring on Thursday.
She told me "nothing." I pressed. "Come on, Mom, are you sure? You're going to do everything? How about a dessert?"
"Nope. You don't have to do anything, Colleen! Just enjoy." Then she laughed, "Because next year it's back on you." (Which is fine with me.)
But what's interesting is that that is the case on my mom's side of the family–always, the host/hostess does everything. You show up, a guest for dinner. You might be able to help clear the table or clean up (but my mom is so particular about how her kitchen is cleaned up that that's pretty much where it stops–don't dare try to load the dishwasher or you might put the stuff in wrong.)
(Hmmm. I've recently begun to threaten Dishwasher Loading Classes at my house since I'm constantly rearranging the dishes in there. Think the apple fell pretty close to the tree in that case?)
Now, when we have family get-togethers with my in-laws, it's a different story. We all bring one or two dishes when we come, that way the host/hostess doesn't have to do it all. That's the norm for that side of the family.
Pretty much without exception, that's how it goes, as far as family dynamics for holidays/dinners.
How do you do it at your house? Do you have a preference?
And, finally, the most burning question of all: do you put your silverware handle-up or handle-down when you load the dishwasher????
November 19th, 2007 at 3:44 pm
First…it’s handle down, of course. How do you expect the tines of the forks to get clean?!
In my family we potluck. I’m hosting this year, and since we have a huge crowd (17 in my immediate family), everyone brings stuff. I’m making the stuffing, potatoes and the turkey. My siblings will bring all the rest of the stuff. It works out really well this way. Plus, we divvy up the leftovers so no one is left with too much stuff.
November 19th, 2007 at 4:24 pm
handle down!
Host does everything and then we require that you bring your own containers for left overs so that we don’t have so much left at the hosts house.
November 19th, 2007 at 4:28 pm
Handle down, of course (except for knives) ~ otherwise, you get those darned water spots.
For our family, the host/hostess does the majority of the work, but I’m always asked to bring the frog eye salad. It doesn’t matter what the occassion is, if the family’s getting together, that’s what I’m asked to bring.
November 19th, 2007 at 4:33 pm
Our family dinners (and ones with friends as well!) are always potlucks. Bring a few dishes, or at least the parts of dishes!
As for the dishwasher, I do silverware both ways oddly enough. But I’m picky about how everything else goes in there. I have to be though because my husband is chipping my dishes with the way he overloads!
November 19th, 2007 at 5:00 pm
I’m breaking from the norm to say handle up. The water sprays (mostly) from the bottom (I know some do from top and middle), so the part you eat with gets the strongest stream. Also, when unloading, you’re grabbing the handle, not the eating part (who wants those germs - even though I live alone and it’s my own!)
As to the dishwasher loading perfectionist mother - A-men, sistah!
November 19th, 2007 at 5:22 pm
We always eat at my mom’s on T-Day. Between the 2 of us we do all the cooking there. I’m afraid of what would happen if we ate either of my brother’s cooking.
Oh, handle up.
November 19th, 2007 at 7:57 pm
I hope you have a fantastic Thanksgiving, Colleen!